The Youth Culture Report Card

 Today’s Report Card is here:

3 Keys To Dynamic Youth Ministry

Everyone wants a dynamic youth ministry. Yet, to have that one has to be willing to go the distance, which is not always comfortable. Here are three things I feel are key to having a dynamic youth ministry.

1) Go out on a limb.

You’ve got to be wiling to try new and innovative things. As it is in the tech world, the same is true in other areas of our lives: we want the next best thing. The next best thing doesn’t come to those who wait…it comes to those who create. Shift your services by rearranging the worship setting, introduce topics with video and discussion questions to prime the pump, use more than just videos but incorporate sounds, smells and actions into the service. Do services in reverse, or in silence, outside or in a different venue altogether. Theme out your services, utilizing the current trends in culture or following up on a mainstream idea. Fruit is out on a limb and you’re only gonna get it if you’re willing to risk it.

2) Go beyond the limb.

I’ve heard it said before that as youth workers we must be willing to go so far out on a limb that there’s no turning back. Dynamic youth ministry happens when the youth actually realize that you are willing to do anything and everything to reach them…even if it doesn’t fly. Or you fail at it. Kids want to know you really care and by going for things that are not the usual fare, it helps them to know that you are in it to win them. Taking chances with youth is not easy and the kids are not always going to respond the way we would like but they will most certainly appreciate the efforts and respect you for it. When you’ve gotten the respect, you’ll get the growth. Ultimately kids don’t care how flashy it is if it doesn’t mean anything. Being willing to go beyond the limb is what will help us see lives saved in the end.

3) Maintain your edge.

In a world where everything is “Go!” “Go!” “Go!” It is essential to Slow! Slow! Slow! This sounds contradictory to the other two points but as a youth leader and even as a ministry practice, it is imperative to incorporate down times for dynamic growth. No one can go all the time. If you want dynamic growth you have to be willing to invest in a few solid leaders which takes time! Be willing to spend some time teaching them how to lead and equipping them with how to do it.  Dynamic ministry happens when we maintain our edges by reading, praying and building relationships together. Edge-living Christians must be sharp and stay in tune with their own hearts and souls and relationships with God which cannot happen without periods of silence and retreat. Schedule downtime, plan a silent retreat, and map out your direction. As a trailblazer for dynamic youth ministry, you’ve got to maintain your edge and the best way to do this is to seek God’s direction by faith.

Tech Do’s and Don’ts

 

There is no doubt we are in an entirely different era of life. Smartphones, iPads and iPhones are seen in almost every hand, pocket or purse.  It’s nothing new to see kids texting at the table or hurrying through a meal to get back to their conversations online. But kids are not the only ones guilty of these relational faux pas. Parents are just as likely to be texting during times when connecting with their kids would be best. Whether it’s during “family time”, a sporting event or even church, adults and kids need to set some healthy boundaries for technology and relationships. May I offer a few do’s and don’ts for the school year and even life.

1) Designate a “tech free” time-out.

Technology is great for connecting with people who are distanced from us. However it can prevent us from connecting with people right in front of us! The tendency is to take the people closest to us for granted. Technology fools us into thinking that what’s happening somewhere else is more important or exciting than what’s going on right in front of us. Creating a tech free time-out for certain periods of the day can allow cultivation of personal familial relationships where each person can truly be focused. Setting aside morning times of 3o minutes for breakfast for quiet time, prayers, and connection with each other and God can be a wonderful way to start the day. Also, setting aside time at the dinner table, even if eating out, where technology is banned for the meal time can be a huge witness to others. Closing the day by requiring all phones and technology to be powered off by a certain time can also promote health within the family and allow for a good night’s sleep.

2) Designate a “tech free” zone.

These can be places like the kitchen table, church services, (I know some people have their Bibles on the technology but encourage old fashioned Bible carrying), and the car. All of these places are prime for connecting with each other in meaningful conversations. Technology can become a distraction if we are not careful and create spaces for people to cocoon and become lost for an entire journey “together”.

3) Determine to not allow technology  to prevent connection.

If you are in a room with people you really want to connect with and they are using their phones of tablets, send a text from your phone and simply convey that thought. Use the direct path and communicate that you desire face to face, eye to eye connection at this time. Sometimes the best way to fight a fire is with fire. Sending a simple text, or making a phone call to the person right beside you can be the gentle reminder without condemning.

4) Be consistent with what you ask and what you practice.

If you are going to require your children to use technology in certain ways you have to do the same. You have to pay attention, connect and communicate clearly. Technology is something we as adults feel like we “deserve” or need to do business etc. However, many kids can also feel cheated of their parent’s attention due to technology. It is imperative for the adults to set the right tone and example.

5) Don’t make technology the “bad guy”.

We all know that technology allows us to do so many things we were never able to do years ago. Practicing healthy boundaries and guidelines will only benefit us all the way around. Talk with your kids about the dangers of technology and the importance of safely using their phones, tablets and computers. Construct a family tech covenant that all can sign and honor. By adopting such practices, families and individuals are able to serve God without becoming slaves to technology.

 

 

George Lockhart is a full-time missionary with Vision 2 Hear and serves as youth pastor at new Vision Church in Fayetteville, GA.

Becoming A Deliberate Dad

“Fatherlessness” in America has reached crisis levels!

More than 24 million children or  1 out of every 3 kids is growing up in a home without a father! 

An entire generation of youth are without the influence, guidance or nurturing of a father or father figure in their lives. My involvement with youth ministry and students over the course of 22 years has lead me to understand that the role of a father/father figure is the single greatest need in America today.

Where are the Christian men and why aren’t they stepping up to become the men of God, the deliberate dads they need to be? This is a great question! Although, I have no biological children and am limited in the exact role of being a father, I have mentored many youth, trained in high-intensive discipleship/internships with several young men, and “adopted” several students over the last few years who have no active dad in their lives.  I have been the only “dad” and most definitely, the only positive father-figure in many of their lives. When I say “only”, I mean ONLY! This is what bothers me so much! How is it that I can be the ONLY ONE IN THEIR LIVES?

In being involving in the lives of kids who have attended church or have been part of our ministry teams or overseas mission trips, I have yet to see other men step up or step into their lives in real, significant, and meaningful ways! Through the years, I have been able to fill the void of being a godly father figure in the lives of students in the states as well as other countries (El Salvador and Nigeria).  All of them had a void of an active man in their lives who was pouring life into them, bringing life out of them!  Why are men failing so badly…where are the Christian men of courage?

Recently the movie Courageous spotlighted the topic of fatherhood in America.  But for all of it’s cinematic pulling of heartstrings, the men around our country are still failing to effectively stand in this gap. Why?

1) Many men don’t feel equipped or prepared to be a father! Statistics show that almost 50% of men did not feel ready to be a dad when they became a dad. Some of this lack of preparation is because many men became fathers too young (some of them as early as 15 years old) simply because they  were involved sexual non-committed relationships. They were ready to have sex but not ready to have any responsibilities. As blogger Debbi Schlussel puts it: the men were nothing more than “sperm donors“. She writes:

“It’s sad that many media reports I read about this research refer to “fathers ages 15-44.”  Um, here’s a tip, America:  if you are 15, you are NOT a father in any sense of the word and probably never will be.  You are just a sperm donor.” Even though many teenage boys may be “fathering” children, most men even in good families would agree that they feel unprepared for the task afforded them.

2) A lack of materials or encouragement in fatherhood is another reason men say they are failing in this area or parenting. I understand this to some degree; however, there are more books, CD’s, DVD’s, websites, and resources than ever before! Access to these materials is not that difficult and not insurmountable for the father who truly wants to be engaged in their kid’s lives.

That’s really the heart of the matter, right? Do we want to be involved? Do we want to be inconvenienced? Do we want to be bothered? Are we willing to be humble? Are we willing to admit we don’t know what to do? Are we willing to step up and be responsible, plugged in, engaged and love our kids?

I believe the reason more men are not involved in their kid’s lives, being the father figure they could and should be, is seen in the title of this article. Achieving the kind of significance and impact I’m talking about will not happen without a deliberate choice. It will take a deliberate act…many of them in fact, to connect, mentor and prepare the youth of this generation for the role and mantle God has for them. It’s time for the men of our churches to become deliberate dads!

I cannot stress enough the point that these will have to be DELIBERATE acts that you as a man must take. We can no longer abdicate our roles as fathers, dads, mentors, coaches, and friends of our children, especially our sons. If we continue, an entire generation will grow up not knowing how to be men, how to love their families and how to engage God or others the way they were created to.

Here are a few of ways to becoming a deliberate dad.

Connect with God.

It is your responsibility to nurture your personal relationship with God. This is not the responsibility of your pastor, small group, or church. Your relationship with God is the most vital connection to ensure establishing good connections with every person in your life. If you are not discipling yourself to have daily time with God in prayer and bible reading and study then this is the place to begin. Connection with God will not only help you become the man that you need to be, since you will begin to understand the call of God on your own life, but it will also give you insight into “fathering” from the best Father Himself!

Connect with your kid!

In our culture it is somewhat ironic that we can be so connected to devices and technology and yet so disconnected from each other in deep and meaningful ways. We are mentally tethered to our phones or tablets or computers and seem to be incapable of conversations that go beyond the length of a status update. As a man, communication may be a challenge and finding the words to say, the emotion to convey, or the prayer to pray, everything but easy. Be deliberate man! Put down that computer, walk away from the tablet, turn off the phone! Connect with your kid in conversation. Look him in the eye and listen to his heart! Seek out a skill to teach him that he wants to learn. Flip the script and ask him to teach you a skill you need to learn. Every kid is different in the things they enjoy doing but every kid is the same in this way: they just want our attention and affection. You have to find out what makes your kid tick. What do they need to most hear from you and sense from you? Protection? A sense of pride? Security? Leadership? Love?

 

 

Connect with others.

With the plethora of materials available, join with other men who want to connect and make a difference in the lives of young men and women. There are far too many men who for pride’s sake have failed to become all they could. Not knowing is not an excuse, men! You don’t know what to do because you have failed to deliberately seek help. Isn’t that the ageless joke of the male species: you won’t stop and ask for directions? Get time with other men…even those who are not doing so great and spur each other on! Don’t let this go down on your watch! Find some men in your area or church and deliberately come up with a strategy to engage the young men in your church, especially those who have no father figure. You may be their only hope.

It is incumbent for us men to rise up and be all that God has ordained us to be. This will not only take courage but deliberate acts of selflessness, authenticity, and love for a generation of young men who have only us to look to as examples.

 

 

 

George Lockhart is a missionary with Vision 2 Hear and serves as the student minister at New Vision Church in Fayetteville, GA.

Adventurously Expectant YS Material

I have to say that I was very excited about this year’s passage and the thoughts behind the YS convention’s theme. They have made some great materials available to those of who who attended and here is a copy for you if you’d like to go through it with me over the next few weeks.

NYWC2011ConventionBibleStudy_AdventurouslyExpectant

Please comment back on the study and share your insights, thoughts and comments on how God is working in your life. I’d love to hear what Papa says to you and for us to share the adventure together!

Eagerly Anticipating!